Now, this is just wrong.
The bags under my eyes have bags under them. My mirror mocks me when I'm too tired to fight back.
Maybe I'm not re-rested since my daughter and her husband went home. Oh, hey, the funniest thing. Thinking of her brought it to mind.
You've undoubtedly heard about the Transportation Security Administration's new full-body, full-see machines that scan people trying to board an airplane - you've heard the ruckus it's causing across the country. People even refuse to go through it.
A week after she got home, Dana wrote an e-mail. You've got to read it.
"Morning. So, ya know how the TSA pat downs have been all over the news? Well, this guy invented these stupid underwear with fig leaves made out of powdered metal that you can't see through when you go through a body scan. It's the dumbest thing I've ever seen, and guess who invented it. Colorado man Jeff Buske!"
Interjection here. Her husband's name is Jeff Buske, but he is not the Colorado man who invented powdered metal fig leaves. OK, go on.
"It's been all over the news, and we've been getting calls from stations and channels since Friday wanting interviews. We got our first call this morning at 4:42 AM!!!!! We've known for awhile that this guy is a royal nutcase - we've had friends call him looking for us and he was totally mean and yelled at them.
"But now I'm all tired because I never really got back to sleep after the first and second calls, both before 6 this morning. Who does that? I mean, really?
"Anyway, just stupid and kind of funny, but I hope it blows over soon."
It better, or she could get bags under bags under her eyes, too.
I haven't seen any story running on the AP wire about that Buske and his invention, but they got calls from Canada, even. I wonder how the authorities have handled that.
Back in Dodge, the Ringland Smeltzer House is holding an open house from 2 to 5 p.m. on Dec. 12, so if you've ever wanted to see inside that glorious historic home, now's the time to do it. It's free.
The home has gotten a facelift recently, and those in charge say the revamped woodwork is stunning. Both the main floor and second floor will be open to visitors. The house, by the way, is at 1019 Second Ave. S., on the corner of 12th Street.
That's something to look forward to, and you won't have to wear powdered metal underwear because nobody's going to scan you.
So long friends, until the next time when we're together.
Contact Sandy Mickelson at (515) 573-2141 or firstname.lastname@example.org