Photo by Ross Bartachek/IAwrestle: Drake Ayala of Iowa works against Lucas Byrd of Illinois in the 133-pound championship match on Saturday night.

The family, friends and fans of Drake Ayala were on the brink of celebrating like they never had before.

The Fort Dodge community anxiously awaited as well, ready to crown its first Division I wrestling champion since 1962. The media also felt the anticipation.

Even Iowa’s head coach, Tom Brands, said he had prepared a speech touting Ayala’s unbreakable hometown roots after his climb to the summit.

And then something heartbreaking happened. Not to us, but to Drake.

Again.

For the second consecutive season, Ayala reached the national finals. Trying to avenge a loss by decision a year ago in the gold-medal round, Ayala was dealt a controversial sudden-victory setback against top-seeded Lucas Byrd of Illinois at 133 pounds.

Coming up short so deep into the NCAA Tournament is brutal enough in wrestling. This was particularly gut-wrenching, though — a toss-up match clouded in doubt, confusion and, ultimately, indignation.

As any athlete will attest, winning is the hardest thing in the world to do — especially at an elite level. Only 10 national champions were crowned on Saturday night in Philadelphia. Ayala was not one. Neither was Olympic gold medalist Gable Steveson, for that matter.

The reaction to winning, on the other hand, is easy and fun for the rest of us. We come to expect steady success from athletes and teams who make it seem like second nature. When it doesn’t happen, we’re dispirited. We get frustrated. We lament. We second guess. And then we typically move on, because life goes on.

There is a person behind the jersey or the singlet, though. A human being who aches with a piercing hurt in ways we can’t even begin to comprehend. And that pain doesn’t just go away for them because the moment fades.

So here comes the complicated part for a community that truly wants to be there for Drake Ayala: find ways to be as supportive and encouraging as possible in the days and weeks to come. Let him know you’re disappointed for him, not in him. Because this is about Ayala and his experience — not us and ours.

Reaching the Division I national championship round in wrestling is a remarkable achievement in and of itself. Until last year, no Fort Dodger had done so in over 60 years. Ayala has now accomplished it twice in as many seasons.

No one — and I mean no one — wanted the title more than Drake. The Hawkeye junior will say the right things publicly and point to the big picture. He’ll hit the reset button and go back to work very soon. He’ll handle the long, lonely walk back to the starting line like the mature, driven, focused person he is.

That doesn’t mean the inner confusion or doubt or regret will subside anytime soon, though. He was truly that close, and he knows it.

Now is the best time for us to remind Ayala just how proud we truly are of his efforts both on and off the mat — not just in victory, but through the adversity. That’s the first responsibility of being an unconditional supporter of any athlete or team. And we often lose the plot when it comes to this.

I watched a recent postgame interview with a coach and his players after a devastating basketball tournament loss. A reporter acknowledged their physical and mental suffering, but also, didn’t hesitate to ask about the future in the next breath. During the Brands interview on Saturday night, someone did the same when discussing Ayala.

So many of us have the luxury of just instantly looking ahead. We’re not invested at the level these athletes are — especially in the present. We think we care and have a passion for it, but it pales in comparison to being in the trenches and putting in the actual work.

We love it. They live it — in ways we will never know or understand.

Respect their space. Show decency and empathy. Keep things in perspective. Athletes must show mettle and resilience in the face of an oftentimes-crushing reality. It wouldn’t hurt the masses to take a step back and do a much better job of following suit.

This is when “for better or worse” is tested most — not just for someone like Drake Ayala, but all of us as well.

Eric Pratt is Sports Editor at The Messenger. Contact him via email at sports@messengernews.net, or on Twitter @ByEricPratt